Goodbye Binki

So, I know to many people, giving up your binki at age 3 is ridiculous.  Well, we finally encouraged River and put our foot down once all of our traveling was done in June.  I always want to remember it and someday I want River to read about this milestone in his young life. We were so very proud of him that he decided to do it last Wednesday.  First we cut the tip off of his binki, tied it to a string and hung it on a tree. Logan, River and I went outside before bed and I will never forget the feeling I felt.  River excitedly ran over to the tree and it was like a part of me was hung on the tree too.  The part that says, you are not a baby anymore.  You are my big boy and all the times flashed of River as a baby up until now of that binki in his mouth before bedtime or on the couch to watch a movie.  The comfort was gone.  As tears rolled down my face, I uttered the words..."I am so proud of you River.  You are such a big boy!"  I could not help but notice tears in Logan's eyes too.  We just smiled. The "binki ferry" came that night...after he was asleep and took the binki.  She put a wrapped present under the tree.  River was very excited to go to bed so that he could wake up and get the present under the tree outside.  Little did he understand that his "3 year comforter" would never return.  I knew it.  I assumed that the next day would be awful at nap time and it was.  Imagine taking your favorite thing away from you, cold turkey, forever.  Just awful.  He was so excited in the morning to run outside and open up his horse trailer he had asked for.  Yes, I called the binki ferry and had a long conversation with her about River getting big now and how he needs to give up his binki to babies..etc. and that he was ready for a horse trailer.  The next 3 days at nap time in particular were so horrible.  He begged me to tell the binki ferry that he was not done and he wanted his binki back.  He would cry, not just any cry, but close to vomitting for 1 hour until he would give up and fall asleep in my arms.  River never knew that tears flowed down my face silently for his pain.  As gushy, over sentimental, and/or dramatic as this all sounds, it is how I felt.  How River felt.  And now, 1 week later, he has adjusted and is just fine.  Just like they all are eventually.  Once again, even with the little stuff in life like giving up your binki, time heals! River, mommy and daddy love you and are proud of you.  We did not have our camera to take a picture of your binki hanging on that tree but daddy and I will always have that picture within us.